Book Review on Love That Last by Jefferson and Alyssa Bethke

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If you are looking for a book that talks about the great, good, bad, and ugly of relationships, then this is it. Love That Lasts does not hide anything. Jeff and Alyssa did not sugar coat a thing. They talk straight from the heart about their past struggles and how God worked in them individually to bring them together. This book also has workbooks for him and her that go along with the chapters.

When you read the title of the book and look at the picture, the first relationship to come to mind is a marriage. But this book is for everyone. There is something in here for the singles, the dating, the engaged, the newlyweds, and the not so new newlyweds. Different chapters relate to different relationship phases of their lives. I absolutely recommend this book for anybody!

Okay, back to the book itself. What I thought was really clever was the fact they used different song titles for the name of each chapter. The song title related to what they were talking about in that chapter.

From the very first line in chapter 1, I was hooked. Jeff started with his past, which was not so great. My first thought was “Woah. This just got personal.” In this chapter, Jeff said we see love “as something we feel instead of something to commit to.” And this is so true. Especially with my generation, people think love is a feeling and not an action. If the relationship makes you feel good, then you stay and if not, then you leave. Which is totally wrong!

Anyway, they talk a lot about each phase of a relationship as the book progresses. The first few chapters are about their times of being single. Singleness is looked at as something bad and “You still don’t have a bf/gf yet?” And this shouldn’t happen. Both Alyssa and Jeff talk about how being single should be the best because you have that time to do whatever you want and grow closer to God. That changes when you’re in a relationship with other responsibilities.

The next few chapters talk about how they met and fell in love and started their dating relationship. Oh and there was a break-up. She wasn’t into him at first and he said he was going to marry her. They talk about the highs and lows of long distance relationships and how that can really put a strain on things, but also be a blessing. While she was in Maui, Jeff flew out to visit her. She felt doubts about their relationship after he left, and he fell madly in love. Then what happened next? They broke up! But they both say it was probably the best thing because they were able to rely on God so much and grow. God was all they had.

The last couple of chapters talk about the second time they dated and about getting married and their marriage itself. Because they broke up and had time to mature and think about what they both wanted, they realized it was each other. They pursued the relationship with better, Godly intentions this time around. This led to an engagement and ultimately marriage. Marriage is not easy, but it is a blessing. They talk about what they expected going into the marriage and what reality was.

All in all, I truly enjoyed this book. I felt both Alyssa and Jeff were very honest about every phase of their relationship, whether that was good or not so good. In the very last chapter, the question is asked “What if marriage is not about making you happy but making you holy?” I had never thought about that before. But it makes so much sense. If you are in a marriage to make you happy, then you are going to fail miserably. Marriage is not always going to make you happy. But if you are in the marriage to reflect Christ and become more like Him, holy, then you will be more happy because you are doing it the way God intended. I want to leave this review with a quote from Jeff, “A true marriage, and one that brings the most joy when lived in, is one that celebrates and grows each person simultaneously.”


If you would like to grab a copy of Love that Lasts, click here.

If you would like to grab the corresponding workbooks for him and/or her, click here for him and click here for her.


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